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{When the Lord presses me to read previous blogs I’ve written, for the sake of my soul I must pay attention. This blog was originally posted as The Flashlight on July 5, 2011. I very well could have written it today, but more importantly—I need to read it today. Thanks for joining me on the journey.}

The door was left wide open, guards slept, and darkness fell. The scene was set for danger. And I was vulnerable. It didn’t take long for the first attack. A hook caught my flesh and a stronghold secured. I was going down…


I was not alone. The sound of the flashlight bounced off the walls of my soon-to-be prison. I froze as the rays caught my frame in the shadows. I tried to run, even deflect the rays somewhere else. But the light did not move toward excuses or blame. It shone directly on the condition of my soul.

His holy light beamed from heaven. My weakness exposed. The truth revealed. I left the door open, I permitted the guards to relax, and I welcomed darkness into my heart.

The reality sickened me. It was just a moment of wander, yet nothing was hidden from Him. I waited for shame. I waited for condemnation. I waited for the heavy hand of God to wave His finger at me.

He said nothing to me. Nor did the holy beams emit disapproval or disgrace. He simply revealed

I. Was. Not. All. His.

I paused. Strangely, I felt confused. Was I willing to give up the mystery of the night for the wonder of God? Was it worth it? I had so much to lose—

And yet so much to gain…

I pulled out of my self-centeredness long enough to notice the light beams were still on me. I stood still and let the Light flood my soul. The warm glow began to restore my soul and my senses. I didn’t belong in darkness—I was created to bask in the Light.

“God forgive me.”

He did. He always does. His grace is big enough. His love is strong enough—even when mine is not.

On the journey with you ~L

~What do you see when God shines His light on you?

Here or somewhere…be real. Share your journey.

Reflective Scripture

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24

Relevant Worship

Forgiven by Bethel Live featuring Brian Johnson

Closer by Bethel Live featuring Steffany Frizzell-Gretzinger