Today is a busy day for me and for you. I would never post something on a Saturday, but sometimes you (yes, you) share comments with me that I can’t escape—and your words stick with holy glue to my soul. And when that happens—well, I know God is up to something. And it’s up to me to courageously walk in obedience.
So, I’m disregarding the fact that Saturday postings don’t get a lot of traffic—especially on holiday weekends. But I’m going to trust the One who set this up because He knows one of you is ready for this.
Yesterday I wrote a blog on how I would spend my first Father’s Day without my dad. One of my readers, Delores, left a thought-provoking suggestion in the comments.
I’d add one more thing to your list – do something to share the love you got from your dad, in honor of him, for someone who doesn’t really know their dad or have such a wonderful list of memories. What would your dad have done to share that love? A card, a smile and hug, a prayer, a gift, a game of golf, a walk and a listening ear? When doing things in memory of my loved ones, I find comfort to share their special touch in my life with others.
I think Delores is on to something.
Her ideas were great promptings for God to open my heart to the idea of something bigger and beyond the healing and honoring moments I prepared for Father’s Day. Those will be sacred moments indeed, but for the most part, except for my husband and boys–I will be alone.
I don’t want to be alone.
I. Need. You.
My heart longs to reach out and embrace my dad, but heaven is too far away. Too far. I need you to do it for me. Please.
~
Daughters,
I ask this with a heavy heart—will you…please, hug your dad this weekend. Will you hug him for me? Will you hug him for you?
I know this sounds silly. A crazy plea that will never manifest into feeling my own dad’s arms around me…but somehow I want to believe that it will. Will you? I need you to do this for me. And something tells me you need to do it for you.
And Fathers,
Will you do this for your girl? Look her in the eye and tell her she is special. Tell her you believe in her. Tell her you will always love her—no matter what. And hug her for as long as she can stand it.
I know this is hard for many, not to mention outrageously vulnerable. One thing I’ve learned from you over this last past year is not all of you have shared the same relationship as I did with my dad. I’m so sorry. I really am. It hurts my heart to know that. But maybe, it’s time for reconciliation. Maybe it’s time to rebuild what was lost. Maybe it’s time to heal through a hug, phone call or a text. Maybe this Father’s Day you will have a brave heart.
I believe healing comes through God by way of vulnerability and within the safety of community. You are safe here.
*sigh*
I don’t know if this is what Delores was suggesting, but it’s the big thing that swelled up in my heart. Honoring the love my dad and I shared to become a launching pad for your relationship with your dad to deepen.
One more thing. I love pictures. Will you send me a picture of you and your dad?
I asked my dear friend Robin this crazy “hug your dad” request last fall. She did and surprised me with a photo. I’ve never met her dad, but if I remember right, I sobbed for nearly an hour after looking at the photo and healing and comfort came by way of hugs and tears.
With your permission I will post all the photos I receive in a collage here on the blog next week. If you don’t have a photo, that’s okay, I would love for you to share your story.
And if you are grieving like me, please, send me your photos too. Let’s honor, and heal…together.
Thank you friends. The journey is always richer with you.
Laura
*Send photos or email your dad stories to me at laura@laurakramer.org I’ll be collecting them through the end of the day on Wednesday June 19th.
Sharon said:
Oh Laura what a wonderful idea!! Your blog Thursday prompted me to reach out to my dad, who lost a dear friend suddenly a few weeks ago, and he’s coming up for the day tomorrow. I’m so excited and would be honored to send you a picture. Thank you for always inspiring me.
Laura Krämer said:
Oh Sharon, I’m so blessed to know it touched your heart. I hope you had a beautiful time with your dad. Blessed.
P.S. Send me the picture! 🙂
Delores Liesner said:
Laura, I will be praying for many acts of love and reconciliation tomorrow in memory of your Daddy. Love you, Delores
Laura Krämer said:
Thank you Delores. Thank you.
drews4god said:
Hi Friend! Still trying to get back on your comment session, so will share this way today. It gets better………….it takes time, but it does. And I had that wonderful Father/Daughter connection too. But I love that you do everything with meaning and excellence…even grieving. I know your words will comfort and inspire many to express their love more freely…appreciate more deeply…. I woke up today and wished God a happy Father’s Day, and asked him to wish my Dad one too. So glad to forever have him in my heart, and to be able to wish this with only one tear, and not a thousand. It will come…but this time is not to rush through…and I’m glad you are allowing yourself to fully feel….that is healing…for you, and for your followers…thank you! XO, M.
Laura Krämer said:
Thank you for sharing Michele. And thank you for encouraging my heart. I feel like I’m so far away from my thousand tears turning into only one…but I suppose it will take time, just like you said. Thank you.
Sherry Meneley said:
Wish I could hug my dad…. but 3000 miles separate us.
But there was a time I would not hug my dad… I was angry at what I took for rejection.
I’m humbled to my knees by how ice has melted from my heart, and all that remains is love. A holy-magic gift given to me before it was too late.
So in my heart, I hug my dad 3000 miles away.
Laura Krämer said:
You are a brave soul to allow the ice to melt. Very brave.
Love you friend.
Delores Liesner said:
Laura, Have to share you my opportunity to bless someone in honor of your daddy today. I had Children’s church for older kids and prayed asking God to direct me to whom I could bless in Laura’s daddy’s memory. Began thinking how tough Mother’s Day always was for me, because there was no card for an abusive Mom. I thought there must be others for whom Father’s day is equally tough, and asked God to help me encourage one of those. She happened to be in Children’s church, angry and arms folded against Father’s Day messages or crafts or love for a deserter dad she didn’t know. Her eyes grew wide when I began that today is a tough day for some people, explained my mother’s days and how our heavenly father healed my bitterness by showing me that was the father and mother that others could not be. Our craft became a reminder that we had a loving father who knew every detail about us before we were born, and brought us to where we were today. The regular lesson got taught too, but it was a blessing to watch her demeanor change and for her to high five me when she realized we were sisters in the Lord and had the same Abba! I’m sure your Daddy was watching and smiling at what his little girl started 🙂
Laura Krämer said:
Delores. Oh. My. Goodness. I…I don’t even have words. Tears. I do have tears. This touched me…oh-so-deeply.
Oh. My. Goodness.
I don’t know how to say this right…but I almost feel like my Dad’s destiny is becoming accomplished here on earth…even though he is gone. How can that be? God is so very good.
God is redeeming so much in this one story…including your own story. Through your pain from your mom–He has given you compassion for others in their own journey. What a gift. A true gift.
P.S. I do believe it was you who started this whole thing! 😉
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